LANGUAGE OF THE HEART (Rituals, Stories and Information about Death) by Carolyn Pogue ($14.95)

$12.95
NRST: 1-896836-17-8

In Language of the Heart, author Carolyn Pogue offers stories and resources for creating meaningful and healing ceremonies. The book answers the questions many of us have about financial and legal matters, living wills and ethical wills, organ donation, and what to expect at a funeral home. It also contains sample memorial ceremony outlines, prayers, and suggested scripture readings.

Includes unique resources for situations when there has been a death of a child, when the relationship was unloving, when the death was a suicide.

Reviews in the Media:

"It confirmed the things I do in ministering to the grieving, and opened my eyes on how to minister to those anticipating the death of a loved one. I recommend Language of the Heart to anyone concerned about family and friends who will be grieving, to clergy who offer support, and to funeral directors and other helping professionals." - Rev. Mr. Joel W. Chrastka, Deacon & Grief Counsellor
"Any book about death would seem to have a 100-per-cent target audience; we all die, and we all know people who die.
"Pogue tries to take the mystery out of necessary tasks such as funeral preparation, a process that takes most people by surprise at a point in their lives when they're emotionally vulnerable as well as inexperienced.
"The book is about ways to create a ceremony that satisfies the emotional needs of those left behind, allowing them to grieve and move on." - The Sunday Daily News
"At times, every minister wishes for more background material when facing funerals and grieving people. This book offers a wealth of information and practical matters on the subject. Worth the price of the book are the bibliography and index alone." George Dobie, The Presbyterian Church in Canada
"But in the quiet, sensitive compassion that informs every word of this little volume, the bereaved will also find much pastoral and emotional care, made real and accessible by the liberal use of story and anecdote." - John Bird, The Observer

Excerpts:

Once I was in the company of a woman whose grandmother had died. A friend joined us and said, "I'm sorry to hear about your grandmother." The woman thanked him for his concern. He then asked the grandmother's age. "Ninety-six," came the answer. "What did she die of?" he asked. I've been laughing at the answer for years. "Of being 96!" replied the woman.
Marie Saretsky, a Saskatchewan artist, creates paper products and dried flower arrangements... She says that the ritual of using flowers at times of death is nothing new. Thousands of years ago, people placed handfuls of flowers on graves in Asia. Flower wreaths (circles being the symbol for eternity and wholeness) were used in funerals in Egypt 4500 years ago. Some of our rituals are so old they seem bred in our bones.
When we use rituals, we use the language of the heart.
My husband, Bill, was with his mother when she died. His story of this time is one of the reasons I fell in love with him, in fact. He says that his mother was very small, and that he was able to hold her and caress her. He held her close to him and spoke into her ear, giving her a litany in effect, of all the people who loved her and were with her. He said it was important not to feel rushed, but to take as much time afterward as he wanted. After she died, he stayed and spent a long time just being and thinking and remembering.