Matthew 22: 1-14 (links validated 8/31/23)

As for the guy without the proper wedding garment, on the surface, it seems an over-reaction. But even in our increasingly super-relaxed, casual world, certain expectations exist. A student showing up to class in a bathrobe and slippers would be seen as disrespectful to the teacher and the class. The comedian Jerry Seinfeld shared how one time when he was on an airplane, a new flight attendant was working her first day and hadn’t gotten her uniform yet; when she asked people to buckle their seat belts, people looked at her like “who the heck are you???” A person’s attire is important and how they present themselves. So, the guy in the parable, not honoring the invitation by being dressed appropriately, is being ungrateful and disrespectful. Jesus adding this character to his story was meant for the rest of the crowds. He’s pointing out that yeah it’s bad that those who were expected to accept Jesus, didn’t. But that doesn’t mean there wasn’t standards and expectations for those who do end up coming...

The fanfare and craze over British Royal weddings is well-known, and the most recent example of Harry and Megan’s nuptials rivaled that of Diana to Charles a generation earlier. Have you noticed the fascinators (women’s decorative headwear we might be tempted to call hats) at British weddings? In North America, women wearing headcoverings at church services belong to either ultra-conservative churches or to the vibrant tradition of African-American congregations. At formal weddings in the UK, the fascinator is appropriate attire. Imagine, then, if the wedding planner looked out at all the women in the pews and said to one, “Friend, how did you get in here without a fascinator?” It would seem arbitrary, but it’s also a reminder that there is a right way (righteousness) to conduct one’s self, based upon the kind of call one has received to the event.

So why are some people who are already in the promised banquet-land excluded for the feeble-sounding reason that they are improperly dressed? What has helped me understand this odd state of affairs is CS Lewis’s wonderful fantasy, The Great Divorce, which he wrote to suggest that the option between heaven and hell is a radical choice we all have. Another poor soul wears a small, slimy red lizard on his shoulder, a twitching, chiding garment of shame and disappointment. This lizard is his clothing, his self-image and self-presentation to the world. It is a symbol, Lewis leads us to believe, of some sin of lust, which the pilgrim soul both hugs for identity and carries for self-pity. An angel approaches, offering to kill the slimy creature, which protests that if he is killed, the soul will surely lose his life and meaning. The ghost-soul, encouraged by the angel, finally lets go of the lizard, but only with trembling fear. He gasps out a final act of trust: “God help me. God help me.” And with that plea, a mortal struggle ensues, the lizard mightily resisting while a wondrous metamorphosis happens. The lizard is transformed into a glorious creature. “What stood before me was the greatest stallion I have ever seen, silvery white, but with mane and tail of gold. ... The new-made man turned and clapped the new horse’s neck. ... In joyous haste the young man leaped upon the horse’s back. Turning in his seat he waved a farewell, then nudged the stallion with his heels.” They both soar off, like shooting stars, into the mountains and sunset...

(includes lots of Greek exegesis!!)

(always good insights!)

(excellent exegesis)

But one book that has always stayed with me has been “The Giving Tree.” Have any of you read that one? It’s the story of a boy and a tree who are able to talk to each other. It starts out the boy is a little kid – who would play in the tree, eat her apples, fall asleep in her shade. The boy loved the tree and that made the tree happy. But as the boy became older, things changed. The tree still wanted the boy to play and enjoy the tree as he used to – but the boy explained I’m too big to climb, I want to have things – I want money. The tree explained that she didn’t have money but offered her apples which could be sold and could get him money. So the boy did just that – he climbed, took the apples, sold them and left. Then he’s gone for awhile – some years in fact – and then the boy needs a home for his family, so he returned to the tree, and the tree is happy to see him, but says she doesn’t really have a home to offer him. So she offers her branches to be cut and used to build a home – and so he does just that. He cuts them down, uses them and leaves the tree alone again for years again...

Tom Long once related something that, as he himself admitted, may sound like the set-up for a joke but that is actually a real story. He said that one day Barbara Brown Taylor, Fred Craddock, and he all attended an Atlanta Braves baseball game (“Three homileticians walked into a bar and . . .”). Unbeknownst to them and to others in the stands that day, a drunken man several rows ahead of them was apparently causing problems. The next thing they knew, several burly men wearing bright yellow shirts with the word “SECURITY” written across their backs barreled down the aisle, lifted this apparently troublesome man from his seat, and carried him clean out of the stadium. The crowd sat in stunned silence until finally the somewhat high-pitched voice of Fred Craddock piped up to say, “Obviously he didn’t have a wedding garment on!”...

In a seminar on Matthew’s gospel, Tom Long pointed out that in Matthew, it’s never a good thing to be addressed as “friend.” Every time someone is called a friend in Matthew, what follows is not pleasant! Jesus himself was referred to as a “friend” by the religious authorities in Matthew 11 but it was no compliment: they accused Jesus of being “a friend of tax collectors and sinners.” In the previous chapter from last week’s lection, the master of the vineyard overhears the grumbling and grousing of the 12-hour workers over being paid the same as the 1-hour folks. “I am not being unfair to you, friend” the master says. But there is an edge to that—the grumblers were no friends of the owner! Later in Matthew we find the single most poignant such instance when, having been kissed by the traitor Judas, Jesus asks him, “Friend, what have you come for?” But a close second to that final devastating use of “friend” may well be here in Matthew 22 when a hapless wedding guest is addressed as “Friend” right before being most definitively thrown out on his ear!...

In J.R.R. Tolkien’s final book of The Lord of the Rings, Sam Gamgee, an uncommonly courageous little Hobbit, wakes up after the climactic battle. Thinking everything is lost, he discovers all his friends are around him. He cries out to Gandalf the great wizard, “I thought you were dead. But then I thought I was dead myself. Is everything sad going to come untrue?” Is everything sad going to come untrue? For those of us who believe in the resurrection of Jesus Christ, God’s answer is a resounding, “Yes!”...

Barbara Brown Taylor tells us: “God is not looking for warm bodies but for wedding guests who will rise to the occasion of honoring the son. We can do that in shorts and sneakers as well as in suits and high heels, because our wedding robes are not made of denim or silk. They are made of the whole fabric of our lives, using patterns God has given us—patterns of justice, forgiveness, loving-kindness, and peace. When we stitch them up and put them on we are gorgeous, absolutely gorgeous.” You and I may never dine with presidents or queens or sit at a table like the folks in Downton Abbey. No, we are invited to another table, God’s table and there is truly no better one to be found. That is great cause for us saints to rejoice.

Dieterich Bonhoeffer, a Lutheran pastor and theologian in Germany who died for his faith under Hitler's Nazi rule, contrasted "cheap grace" and "costly grace". "Cheap grace is the grace we bestow on ourselves... the preaching of forgiveness without requiring repentance... grace without discipleship, grace without the cross, grace without Jesus Christ, living and incarnate... Costly grace is the gospel which must be sought again and again, the gift which must be asked for, the door at which a man must knock. Such grace is costly because it calls us to follow Jesus Christ. It is costly because it costs a man his life, and it is grace because it gives a man the only true life."...

Anthony de Mello was a Roman Catholic priest who came from India. He draws on rich streams of both eastern and western spirituality in his writings. In one of his books, he has this to say about the bountiful love of God we come to know around this table — and, of course, when he talks of “the eucharist,” he’s talking about what we Presbyterians call the sacrament of the Lord’s Supper: “Love [he writes] is not like a loaf of bread. If I give a chunk of the loaf to you I have less to offer to others. Love is like eucharistic bread: I receive the whole Christ — and so do you; and the next person; and the next. You can love your mother with your whole heart; and your spouse; and every one of your children. And the wonder is that each stands to gain because love improves in quality each time the heart is given to another person.

("The Giving Tree is the story of a boy and a tree who are able to talk to each other. It starts out the boy is a little kid - who would play in the tree, eat her apples, fall asleep in her shade. The boy loved the tree and that made the tree happy. But as the boy became older, things changed. The tree still wanted the boy to play and enjoy the tree as he used to - but the boy explained I'm too big to climb, I want to have things - I want money...")

("On October 30, 1918, King George V and Queen Mary summoned Colonel Thomas Edward Lawrence to Buckingham Palace. Lawrence was only thirty years old. He thought the meeting was to map out the new boundaries for the Arabs whom he had helped to liberate from the Ottoman Empire. When he entered the palace ballroom, Lawrence saw the royal dignitaries, the costumed courtiers of medieval traditions, a small stool at the foot of the king's throne, and a velvet pillow on which there rested numerous medals. This was a rite of investiture...")

("On the playground, there is a game always going on somewhere–and only a few get chosen. There are the cool kids, really good at the game, who know all of the right moves and all of the right answers. Then there are the unchosen, those who are slow-witted, no good, unfit, unskilled. And if they finally do get to join in, it can be even worse; those who are not good at the game get ridiculed for their mistakes and called names, only adding to what seems obvious to everyone–those who cannot play well do not belong...")

("But our lives aren't being graded; they aren't even being judged, if, by that, you imagine some extrinsic adjudication. No, our lives themselves create, or confound, our capacity for heaven. Earth readies heaven, births it within us. Learn to dance, and you can have great fun at a wedding. But what about the one who never manages to mind the measure? Or the one who doesn't even respond to the invitation?...")

(Includes several quotes and some Greek exegesis.)

["The Wedding of the Year was just held in Venice: George Clooney, world's most eligible bachelor, who's twice been named Sexiest Man Alive by People Magazine (and ten years apart, to boot, 1997 and 2006) wed the stunningly beautiful Amal Alamuddin, reknowned civil rights attorney, born in Lebanon, educated at Oxford and NYU Law School, clerked for Justice Sotomayor, and at 36 has earned her silk at the London bar...."]

("Thomas Merton wrote in "Seeds of Contemplation" that God created humans so there would be a partner in the dance, one to participate in the ongoing act of creation, imagination, a movement around and under and through, a spilling over in a constant flow of energy. Okay, a lot of this is my own interpretation and it probably applies to the story in Matthew 22: 1-14 of the Wedding Feast...")

("A woman is coming to a checkpoint in the middle of the Holy Land. A young soldier is walking towards her...You know from experience what happens next. Instead, this day, at this moment, the pattern is broken. It is uneasy. His is a polite gesture to check a bag. Hers is a gracious response in Hebrew. Once the transaction is over, the woman says to the soldier, 'I have only experienced respect like that in a peace movement that I attended years ago.' He had attended that same program years before..." and another similar illustration)

"Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hanson in their book Aladdin Factor present the formula SWSWSWSW, which stands for 'Some Will, Some Wont, So What, Someone's Waiting'. Jesus seems to take a somewhat similar view when he talks about people being invited to share in the Kingdom of God. He realized that Some Will and Some Wont. He may not have said,"'So What!' but he knew that he couldn't spend a lot of time grieving over those that wouldn't accept the invitation. He knew that there were 'Some Waiting'. The invitation needed to be extended to all..." and other quotes

These last-minute guests are not people who in any sense deserve such a feast. That's significant — because this banquet is all about grace. The first group of invited guests proved their unworthiness. When it comes to filling the hall with the second group, the B-list guests, the king no longer cares how these people fit into the social hierarchy. He doesn't care if some of them are riff-raff. It's all about offering a feast to people who'd feared they would never feast again...

("Walt Whitman's poem, Song of Myself expresses this truth about the gospel and this story: 'This is the meal pleasantly set... this is the meat and drink for natural hunger, It is for the wicked the same as the righteous...I make appointments with all, I will not have a single person slighted or left away, The keptwoman and sponger and thief are hereby invited...")

("During the Second World War, Dr Ernest Gordon was a prisoner of war in Thailand. In his book, Through the Valley of the Kwai, he tells how a healthy soldier began giving his food to a sick buddy to help him get well. In time, the sick prisoner recovered, but the friend who had given him food died of malnutrition. Many other stories are told about how people give of themselves without any concern for their own health and safety...")

It is instructive to drive through ritzy developments—or what David Brooks once called 'sprinkler cities'—and notice that everything a person could possibly want was thought of by the real estate developers. This can be seen in lots of places, including certain sections of northern Michigan along the Lake Michigan coast, an area that has recently seen an explosion of multi-million dollar homes on the choicest lakefront lots...

("I commend for your reading this piece by Susan Thistlethwaite on the Wall Street protests. And it's also a good time to read some Ghandi, as the time for nonviolent protest has arrived in these first week of autumn, much like the Arab Spring...")

("there was the time when we were living in Nashville, Tennessee. One of the church members invited me to lunch. I was wearing slacks and sports shirt, which seemed to be dressy enough. But instead of going to one of the places near the church, we drove downtown, parked in a parking garage and took the elevator to the top floor of a bank building to this really nice, private club. The maitre d' took one look at me and said, 'Hmm. I think we may have a sport coat to fit you in the cloak room.' I've never been more embarrassed in my life...")

No group of people have heard more excuses than teachers. The Toronto Star ran a contest a while back where it invited teachers to submit excuses they had received from their students. Here are some of the more original submitted: A student explaining why he was late: “I was kidnapped by aliens and interrogated for three hours.” Another student, telling why he had failed to turn in his essay: “The bus driver read it and liked it so much that he kept it to show to his passengers.” Another: “I got mugged on the way to school. I offered the thief my money, my watch, and my penknife, but all he wanted was my essay.” Mike, a 14-year-old, came up with this excuse for arriving at school an hour late with his pants soaked to the knees: “I was just about to board the city bus when I found I’d lost my ticket. Since it would take too long to walk to school, I hopped a fence onto a nearby golf course. I headed for a creek that crisscrossed several fairways until I found a likely spot for lost balls. Retrieving three balls from their watery graves, I then made for the clubhouse where I sold the balls for bus fare. And that’s why I’m late!” By the way, Mike’s entry won...

a wise old man talking to a teenage boy about the inner struggles the young man was experiencing between his desires to do good and his desires to be violent and vengeful and spiteful. And the old man describes the two impulses as being two wolves doing battle within him for the mastery of his soul, a good wolf and an evil wolf, both big and powerful and formidable, and now pitted against each other in a deadly struggle for control of the young man. And hesitantly the young man asks the wise elder, “do you know which one is going to win?” The old man looks at him and replies, “The one you feed.”

("I am the man without the wedding robe. This is what I believe about Gospel parables: they are never about the other person. They are also never about people only "back then" in the "long ago" first century. They are about me. The true me. The me who is clever, boastful, humble and sarcastic...")

(includes several quotes)

("In her wondrous book Showings, also known as Revelations of Divine Love, the medieval English mystic Julian of Norwich wrote, "Our good Lord is our clothing that, for love, wraps us up and winds us about, embracing us, all beclosing us and hanging about us, for tender love...")

("What if, Marty Aiken asks, we do not see the king in the parable as God, but as tyrant who would behave exactly as the king in the parable does. After all, the Jews of Jesus' time were very familiar with tyrants, and would have made an immediate connection with the current, local tyrant, Herod...")

Some of you heard the story before; it's set in Europe during World War 2. A soldier has died in battle, and two of his friends in arms want very much to provide him a decent burial. At a village nearby they find a cemetery...

("Just imagine that you were to receive a personal invitation to a banquet at the White House. The President of the United States is going to be there and has personally invited you to attend...")

"Advised to go into exile as a threat to her own repressive government, Wahu Kaara refused – 'I did not want my kids to grow up without an identity!' Isn't that what Jesus is speaking of here – our identity, our solidarity, with him and with one another – in fact, with all others, especially those most in need?..."

("This scene reminds me of the Shakespeare play The Twelfth Night. After a series of intricate twists and misunderstandings, the comedy concludes with a general reconciliation. Naturally enough, it happens as the principal characters announce their marriage...")

("At a church conference in Omaha, people were given helium-filled balloons and told to release them at some point in the service when they felt joy in their hearts. All through the service worshippers kept releasing balloons...")

"An legend tells the story of a fisherman called Aaron. Aaron lived on the banks of a river. Walking home with his eyes half-closed one evening after a hard day's work, he was dreaming of what he could do if he were rich. As he walked his foot struck against a leather pouch filled with what seemed to him to be small stones...

("It’s not that the excuses given weren’t valid but how important were they in comparison to the king’s invitation. Beethoven could have used his deafness as an excuse but he felt composing beautiful music was more important. Louis Pasteur’s paralysis could have been a valid excuse for giving up but he considered his research into penicillin far more important...")

("Once upon a time a family had lived on a street for a long time and had no neighbors because the other lots were vacant. Then many of the lots were sold and new homes were constructed. The original family was delighted...")

("Once upon a time, not so very long ago, well really ten years ago, a group of women planned the 50th reunion of their high school graduation class. There were 110 in their class. About 90 people showed up for their 40th reunion, planned by the same women...")

("Once upon a time a little girl was about to have her seventh birthday party. Now all know how little girls enjoy birthday parties, especially their own. But this particular little girl, I think her name was Fiona, was really a birthday freak...")

"God provides these clothes freely to those who need them. Scripture gives us several glimpses of what these clothes will be like. American metaphysical poet Edward Taylor uses the images of Revelation 7 in his poem Huswifery. 'Then cloath therewith mine Understanding, Will, Affections, Judgment, Conscience, Memory..."

("Local customs and practices can be a shock to newcomers. I recall coming from a church in the Eastern United States to serve a parish in the Midwest. In my Eastern parish, most people who were invited to a couple's wedding reception would also come to the church for the marriage ceremony...")

("'I cannot come to the banquet; don't trouble me now. I have bought me a wife; I have married a cow.' The guffaws and catcalls of the preadolescent boys as they improvised on a familiar song were designed to attract the attention of the girls at the religious retreat...")

Morphine moved silently and painlessly through a small butterfly needle taped to the skin of his abdomen. Donny5 called the device his "beeper" and smothered it with Smurf stickers. He was Doctor Donny, on call. For this nine year old "doctor" with Down's syndrome, the small battery-operated pump anchored to his pajama waist made it possible for him to stay at home and control the pain of terminal leukemia. Hospice nurses came to adjust the dosage from time to time, and Donny moved from his bedroom to the living room where Smurf-bedecked sheets and pillowcases transformed the couch into a most acceptable base of operations. He had more friends than most of us will have in longer lifetimes and could visit with them all in between snoozes. As the leukemia progressed, he had less energy and more cat naps. My phone rang one evening after the nurse had visited and told his parents that he might die that very night. His mother called to ask my opinion. When I arrived, Donny was dozing peacefully on his Smurf sofa, surrounded by a half-dozen assorted friends. He was paler than when I had last seen him, but his pulse was steady. "I went out of the prophecy business a long time ago. I wish I could be sure, but you know how unpredictable these things are." As if on cue, Donny rose from his "deathbed" with a luxuriant yawn. The Prince of Smurfs was hungry and decided to take his guests "out" to dinner. He assumed the role of maitre d'hote at a mythical restaurant and escorted us to our tables. Invisible pad and pen poised in his hand, Donny went from guest to guest, reciting the specials of the evening. For each guest, a different ethnic restaurant was presented with a complete selection from suppe to nuez. After he took the order from his last guest (in a Mexican restaurant), he flopped back into Smurfland and resumed his nap with a self-satisfied sigh of contentment...

("To be corny about it, God maintains what might be called a Potted Plant Roster. Let me explain. When, as an Army Chaplain some years ago, I worked briefly at the Pentagon doing special projects in the Chief of Chaplain's offices. I noticed they had something called a Potted Plant Roster. I figured that when a person's name came up on the roster, it was his turn to water all the potted plants for the month...")

("If you have ever gone to Disney World and stayed on the property there are exclusive resorts and there are also the All-Star Resorts, which are the opposite, in the Disney Universe, from the exclusive resorts...")

("If you are a young man, you often need courage to ask a young woman for a first date. A guy is normally nervous when asking a young lady out for a date for the first time. For example, I remember so many years ago when I was going to ask out this young, blonde chick for a date...")

("A few years ago I was sitting in the executive dining room at the University of Dubuque celebrating with some of the other trustees the exciting future of that institution, a future that has now become an exciting present..." and several other quotes)

("The scene was a very fancy restaurant in downtown Manhattan. A small group of people had arrived for their dinner reservations. The maitre d' greeted the young man who made the reservation with a smile. He asked for the number in the party and the young man replied four...")

("A Passion Play was about to be performed before an audience of thousands. Sitting in the front row with her aunt was a fun-loving, free-spirited, enthusiastic three-year-old. 'It was her first Passion Play. Said the little girl's aunt, I knew what a pleasure it would be to watch my little niece react to the performance...")

("There is a story told about Sir Yehudi Menhuin, the world famous violinist, who also meditates in the tradition taught by Fr. John Main. He was giving a series of concerts in a capital city. One evening as he returned to his hotel after his performance he noticed a little girl, about eight years old and three feet tall, playing a violin at a street corner trying to collect some coins,,,")

Several summers ago I spent three days on a barrier island where loggerhead turtles were laying their eggs. One night while the tide was out, I watched a huge female heave herself up on the beach to dig her nest and empty her eggs into it...

("We were told by the presenter of a friend who one time visited what was purported to be the ovens of Auschwitz where many Jews had lost their lives in what now is called the holocaust. He said that he could still smell burnt human flesh. It was in the bricks..." and other illustrations)

("There is an Arabian fable which tells about a man who went to his neighbor and asked to borrow a rope. 'I can't lend it, because I am using it to tie up a pile of sand.' his neighbor answered. 'But,' the man came back, 'you can't tie up a pile of sand with a rope...")

includes several quotes

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("British bishop N.T. (Tom) Wright comments: 'We want to hear a nice story about God’s throwing the party open to everyone. We want to be ‘inclusive’, to let everyone in...")