by Jim Torpey
"What shall we do?" can often mean "what do we want?".
I hear over and over again that retirement for many couples is a bit of a challenge.
I remember when my dad retired from working at the family run printing company.
The first weeks were ok, but soon dad and mom were "bumping into each other".
Both had their routines for countless years since my sister and I had left the nest, having been given our own wings. But suddenly dad was in mom's way when she wanted to run the sweeper or clean the refrigerator and mom was in dad's way when he wanted to open that same fridge to get a piece of cheese or a slice of Lebanon bologna (you have to be from NE Pennsylvania to know that exactly!).
The event that brought everything to a head was the question mom asked, a month into this new desert experience, "what do you want for dinner?"
Dad had not even finished his coffee and juice at breakfast when the jeopardy question hurled straight toward him, innocently enough. Still it caused the great divide that quickly brought on hurt feelings, hurting words & an awkward silence.
From that day onward, dad was up early, had his coffee and juice breakfast and found a way to get downstairs or out of the house. Mom also adjusted so that if dad were around, they wouldn't be bumping into each other. They found a way, after almost 50 years of marriage, to live what Paul prayed: "Your kindness should be visible to all." That is a challenge, it is where words end and actions challenge us to faith lived. Yep, even if it's just mom and dad.
A "Christmas Want" list that might inspire others in small/large families (even families of faith) to make our kindness visible to each other and to the Lord!
Pink is our vestment and candle color for "Rejoice Sunday". Besides trying to fight off the Pepto-Bismol bottle look, the color is to remind us of the expectation of anniversary of Jesus' birth and His coming again. It comes from the Church watching in the darkness for that glimpse just before sunrise, when the sky is aglow with that beautiful pink/red color that announces the dawn!
It is that kind of HOPE that reminds us that when we ask: "What do you really want for Christmas?"
We bring our world/church concerns to the Lord, still it starts with the heart/home of our mom/dad trying to make kindness visible.
Pocono Pines, PA